Life is hip!

Life is always perfect in it’s timing… Just not in our timing!

I am sure you have heard this.

“Everything in good (God’s) time.”. Divine timing is always on time.

Do you believe it though?

Be honest here.

I would say , a conditional yes .

In a world obsessed with NOW mentality, we all start to fall short of trusting in Divine timing.

Don’t take my word for it.

Look around you.

Want to find a movie? Bam… Use your talk to remote and voila! Need a Frappe.. get it delivered in minutes. Have something to tell someone use snail mail.. hell no. You just text it now.

But, what about when God ( the Universe) says no.

You have to wait… right???

No….

We go into panics and try to make whatever we feel we need happen NOW!

It’s great to know what you want in life and have a clear intention. But…

Beware of the NOW mentality!

We can honestly, become blinded by our own desired outcomes, gripping to them to the point of strangling any chance for Divine to flow it’s magic into our life.

Let me share …

I had a huge ‘set back’! My body started to betray me. I thought it was workout injury. After, six months of denial, I saw the doctor.

He informed me that I needed a total hip replacement.

Disappointed yes!

Inconvenient yes!

NOT in my plan. No!

My vision and goals didn’t include this.. I was going to Bali next year.

This surgery was a NOT NOW moment.

Oct 16, 2017

I decided, I would make a plan do my surgery, be a A+ patient and get my ass back into ‘real life’.

And I tried…

And tried..

But my body didn’t respond as fast as my ” NOW mentality” wanted. It took a very long time…

Perfect time!

yes!

Why Perfect…you ask???

I wanted to get back to my ‘real life’ but this real life had me as it’s captive.

I now have come to know,

God had a hidden blessing in my turmoil!

You see.. I had NO patience with myself.

I wasn’t comfortable with getting older.

I needed to ask for help.

I was too driven by my agendas

My body taught me to get out if my head and trust the process.

I learned to surrender and let God.

And all is well NOW!

Wow, the Divine is always working.

You see,  The disappointing delays that God (the Universe) sends us are not cruel but compassionate.   

Maybe, like me, you may need to learn something first, or have a huge growth moment that will prepare you for what your highest needs.

Don’t waste those disappointing delays. Embrace them! They are magical too.

Patience and surrender are forever this hippy’s guide. Oh and summer 2019, I got to Bali.

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Where’s My ‘Soul’Mate

So you’re up at two a.m!  Yes two A.M! Dammit.

Can’t sleep, mind racing and all alone in your big huge bed.  You saunter down to the fridge seek some comfort from the left over cheese cake from last night.  Doesn’t work!   Next, You grab a small glass of wine, just enough to make you sleepy.  When that doesn’t work, you quickly start scrolling through the latest catches on Match, Tinder and Christian Mingle.

Sound familiar?

Really?  Is this what dating has come to?  Pick a picture, click, connect via brief texts, maybe go on a date and if you don’t like them — BAM back they go in the pool of possibilities for another.  Now this may sound bleak but it does have an era of truth.  No?

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Today, our life is so busy that we resort to a fast food culture for pretty well everything.  Think about it.

  • Banking
  • Pharmacies
  • Laundry
  • Coffee,Food
  • Entertainment
  • Relationship finding
  • Even churches have drive up style services or just live stream

Now, I am not saying that convenience isn’t a good thing BUT…

Dating is very serious business!  Don’t you want to find someone who you can truly be real with? Invite to share that big bed with?  Grow old with?  Love forever?

It is for most people a place to find your soul mate —- right?

I am going to suggest an age-old approach:

Begin within!!!

Yes, within your own SOUL!   Take lots of time to get still, to ask some life-giving questions.  Not just about the list of attributes you want in that person BUT what do you give.

  1. Get still
  2. Close eyes, trust what you hear and don’t settle for anything less.
  3. Ask yourself how you need to show up to attract your ideal ‘soul mate’?

Start with you!   Yes it starts with you.    When we move from our authentic ‘soul’, we aren’t trying to become what someone desires.  We are attracting someone who resonates with our most vulnerable self.

I invite you to fill yourself up from your loving soul.  Not attacking this from a ‘job finding’perspective.  Then click or go to social clubs or do whatever you do.  The other will become attracted to your essence.  The “Je ne sais quoi” is real.  Magic happens when we move from within.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Bee

I went on a walk.  It was sunny, the birds were singing, the grass and trees were bright and welcoming.  There were baby bunnies stirring through the fields, ants were gathering their food, squirrels were watching with a sense of curiosity!
I sipped my coffee from my take out and walked on. Walked right past a magnificent tree who’s roots had dug in for more years than you and I existed.

For much of this walk, I was scrolling through through Facebook, texting, talking on my cell and using my emoji to express the frustrations I was feeling about ‘something’. I wanted all my worries to end. No more struggles!

A bee started following me. Pestering me! I mean, he was up in my face! He persistently kept swirling around my body. He chased me like a cop racing after a dangerous driver. I could of swore at one point I heard sirens! Ha! I yelled out ‘ that’s all I need!’. I came out here to find peace!!!

I threw my coffee cup down hoping that was what he wanted. I ran to another area.

Safe from distraction,
I made a desperate call to a friend to seek advice on ‘my problem’.
But nature hastled me once again.
This time TWO; Right by my ears, darting up close. They were close enough to see their stripes.

I ran off, all the way into my car. Drove for about five minutes and you got it…bzzzz!

I shared my ‘beescapade’ with my friend. He laughed,
I wasn’t listening…

That bee is going to keep bugging me till I get it!

Get it!

What can’t you BE with?

What are the ‘BEE’s’ of your life saying?

I got it!

By the way,. Haven’t seen a bee since I got it🐝

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Woman Aboard — Unbridled freedom awaits

I step aboard… One small bag of clothes, no makeup, some food and beverages to fill our ice box and a heart filled with wonder. 

Immediately, I breathe in the healing fresh air, smell  the mist on the lake and hear the calling of the wind beckoning me to play.
I’m a sailor. And my journeys aboard fill the maps of my life.

Come aboard with me.
Our sailboat Bohica, measures-36 feet long .  Though she shows her age she is magnificent lady! You know.  She lives!  Lives  inside all who come aboard.

It is with her that I experience accelerating, unbridled freedom.

  Throwing the ropes on the dock, I cast away into what I call ‘ My sacred sail in God’s bathtub.’. When I forget how extraordinary God is I just look at the power and beauty of the great lakes.  

Each journey is filled with magic.  You never know what these great waters will throw your way – anything from a glassy lake, to gentle breeze to traitorous gales.   I am passionate to go out and play.
 
Let me take you on one of
those perfect days. Bohica’s sails rise effortlessly.  Wind fills the sails making them musically sway gliding us towards a new destination. Looking upward I am often humbled by her, she is an amazing feat of engineering who’s spirit has existed for centuries.  You see while sailing. I become the collective of all sailors from Columbus, to those pirates who sought treasures, to the refugees who stowed away in search of new land.

There is nothing more peaceful than to be at the helm, with the sun kissing my cheeks and listening to the silence of the laps of water creasing her gently.

I also love those stormy rides.  Our boat commands that I develop unshakable focus and connection.  Yes connection to nature, to my mate,  to my vessel and to my self.  And when we return to shore, sometimes exhausted to the bone,
I can nestle in the sanctuary of our boat’s cabin,  knowing that ‘ I am no longer scared of storms for I am learning to passionately sail my own ship! 

My adventurous life is on board.  I invite you to go on adventures… Throw the ropes that bind you ashore! There is a new you waiting!

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fear — na not today!

So nice to go toe to toe with my fears!

Yes , since I was a little girl, I have been terrify of snakes. I mean, even those pesky little  snakes.  Of course, I could add to that list 101 other fears. Admittedly,I used to be frightened of the dark when I was about six. Then,as I grew more emotionally mature, I let it go.

Honestly, I think children seem to be able to let go of most fears easier then us adults.  I mean, a reassuring parent or teacher can ease their mind.

Unfortunately, as we get older, we sometimes stop  trusting. — Trusting our bosses, spouses, ourselves or even God or the Universe.  We start to question a lot more too.  Our intellect rationalizes our story of fear as ‘reality’.   But is it?

Too often our attachments to our fears become our operating system. It is that limiting belief that keeps us trapped or keeps us in our ‘safe’ world.  How limiting have you become?  Fears keep us trapped.   We can’t do this because we’ve been hurt.  We can’t do that because it cost too much or it’ll take too much time, it’s not worth it. Our list go on and on and on!  Does this sound familiar? If so, you have a choice.

Danger is real!   As Jim Carrey said, “there is a difference between the dog that is going to eat you and that dog in your mind!”. You can learn, in a flash, to distinguish the difference. It is entirely possible to move courageously forwards.

I invite you to take a good look at your fears.

Ask yourself are your fears serving you or strangling you ?

Are they based on real danger or are they a story from past hurts,situations or conditioning?

I know that a key to a present, fulling life is to let go of fear!

Move forward from a trusting place with faith.

I invite you  try it!

Do something that you know scared you and limited you.

I did!  So, I know you can.

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New Years Eve, I held a snake! Not just any snake, big, yellow boa constrictor. This beauty could coil her body around me and snap me like a twig.  She didnt!  Instead, she gave me a gift of seeing her beautiful eyes,touching her strong colorful skin and feeling her power!  I am passed my fear.

Guess, I won’t be worried any more about those little garter snakes in my backyard.

Face your fears in faith! Freedom is right there waiting to liberate you!

Wise One within

Many years ago, My Aboriginal (Native American to Americans) friend affectionately called Daddy Long Legs asked me “Grasshopper, what will my legacy be?” My 29 year old self replied, “I know, an old wise woman — wise beyond belief!” He laughed, “ah lace up those moccasins,young lady, you will journey to the valleys and peaks of life to gain such honor.”

A few years later, divorce plunged me into a valley of paralyzing anguish, loss and despair. Drowning in a stagnant pool of impossibility — I clawed for something, anything to hold onto; Food , Men, reams of self help were my false guides. I mean, I even consulted Mr. Jack Daniels.. How wise was that?

One anxiety filled, sleepless night ,a song came to mind
Neil Diamond sang out,
“I am I said I am said I and I am lost and I don’t even know why”

I cried. “I am. I am I AM!”

At first I Saw the failure,
then ‘ I ‘ who clinging to external securities and identity.
This journey through divorce had stripped me to my essence.

But then something magical and mystical happened.
My heart opened deeper
I saw myself Beyond Wife, beyond mother beyond Lorraine. Beyond definition!

I safely existed here– (point inside). An unfamiliar sense of peace comforted me.

I soaked in the brilliance of wise woman that already existed. My loving wise ‘I am’ existed. She always did. That ‘I am’ is my unshakeably internal compass that fills me with limitless possibility. The wisdom of all ages exists within. In that moment, not only did I know that I would survive, I embraced the knowing that I would thrive. AND I DID!

When adversity comes, and it will, turn inward ; start with your wise one within. From there life is limitless!

Control Freak!

I am….

Lorraine Rey

Part of loving yourself is being able to accept all of you.  I mean ALL!  It is when we reject part of ourselves that we become unauthentic.  All of us are a collection of dark and light.  But, from a young age we learn to judge part of ourselves as wrong, bad or even down right evil.  Have you ever done that?  I have!

In our pursuit to not BE something we begin to judge others.  In reality, we are judging ourselves THROUGH the lens of our view of others.

We see rejected part of ourselves in others.  He is so ______.  She is so ____!   Add your own rejected part here!  Here are some of mine.  Bitch, Control Freak, Crazy Person, Mad Wife, Loser.

I currently am learning to accept that     I am a control freak!   ouch- this is hard to write or even say.

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My teacher and mentor Debbie Ford

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I am so honored to have been guided to become trained through Debbie’s coaching and wisdom.

Debbie Ford was extraordinarily genuine and a healer!  She spoke from her truth and was an example of integrity.  Her love for the world was felt in her words, her bright eyes, her  kick ass approach to all that she did.   She was magical.  I wish I had more time with her!

At one of our trainings, Debbie described standing from the macro~ Connecting from  that place of divine connection and total connection.   At the time, it sounded well woo woo!  But, now I know, it is so possible.  When we speak from the heart, when we are absolutely naked in our truth– we connect vulnerably – we are that divine communicating as  one.  From that place miracles happen!  Debbie was a master at that kind of presence!  She taught through her example to be filled with love and light.  I am forever grateful.

Shine on beautiful Debbie.  Rest in peace.

Miss you.

love from your humble student,

Lorraine

A beautiful soul

A beautiful soul

Much of the world has been shocked by the death of undoubtedly one of the best character actors in our modern times. Philip Seymor Huffman was a giant in his field, a master, who could transcend himself and complete become the characters he portrayed.

Apparently, he was a dedicated father, who like any average Joe, walked his young children to school, attended their school events and loved them dearly. He was a friend, a loving partner and participated in his local community by going for meals, coffee and simply hanging out! A refreshing quality to find in a star of such notoriety.

Then, like many of us, there was another side that few really knew.   Lurking in his shadows was a hideous monster.  The character was a ‘heroin addict’. This side must have been his hardest and perhaps most real role. Within that role, he felt his deepest need to escape. But, what was he escaping?
No one knows for sure.   But Phil knew!

Perhaps, the ‘noise’ was to great. What do we do in our lives when the ‘noise’ is just to much to handle? Our noise can come in many forms. Divorce, death, job loss, empty nest, poverty, success, fear of failure, and on, and on.

When those times come, and they will for each of us, what is in our ‘First Aide’ kit?

Do you have one?

I invite you to ask yourself

What do I need to survive when the noise becomes to great?

Trust what you hear!  Write it down and prepare now.  Remember you can’t easily build a first aide kit when you are in the face of darkness.  Fill it up now!

Few, really knew Philip. Until, last weekend, most had no idea of the level of pain he felt. His dear friend and fellow actor Jim Carrey wrote on twitter, ” Dear Philip, a beautiful, beautiful soul. For the most sensitive among us the noise can be too much. Bless your heart, ;^{ ”

Peace to you dear Philip.

Life is what WE make it.

Ever just do random surfing on the internet.  I do!

Today, I stumbled upon a video, quite by accident (wink).  It was all about the life of Marvin Gaye.  So much conflict, fight, and struggle…yet he passionately choose to express the essence of  life through his voice.

“If you cannot find peace within yourself, you will never find it anywhere else.”
― Marvin Gaye

I passionately believe that statement.  It is the root of all.   Our essence is right within, where all our answers are waiting.  That is where “peace” resides.  The peace within is the well of knowledge, the haven that is available  24 hours, 7 days a week.  In this peace is absolute non-judgement, no fear and pure love!  Once accessed the choice is our to express it and share it.  Believe it!!!

But, what if life is hell around us?  We appear to exist in an world filled with contrary.  We have war, disease, much anger, so many marriages and families plagued by a disconnect.   What to do?

RECONNECT!!!

What if…  each conflict, each sorrow was addressed through that source of peace.   What if that conflict existed so we could learn to come back to our source of love?  What might change?  Soak that in!

BTW, I have tried to live my life from many vantages.  From anger, fear, apathy, to name but a few.  The highest source has always been from that place of peace.  I know that it has changed my life and yes even my external world.  As I go to my source, I am filled with LOVE.  And all is possible from there…

So, Marvin Gaye, though he had a life that seemed like hell.  He shone brightly.   He learned to ignite that essence.

Shine on my friends!

with love and support always,

Lorraine

ImageIt’s almost Halloween!!!I absolutely LOVE this holiday.  It is so fun to see all the trick or treaters knocking at our doors.  They are filled with the spark of awe and creativity.  How authentic!  LOVE LOVE LOVE it!
I also think it is a great time for us Adults to lighten up and play.  I invite you to let your crazy, frightening, spooky or pretty self out to party.   Don’t limit yourself!  Really have fun.  It is a great time to allow a part of you to shine.    It might even be a part that is usually not so acceptable to yourself or others.
This past weekend, I did just that.  I went as the “Princess Kitten”.  This is a part of me that I have long rejected.  I was called the princess as a young girl.  My family and especially my mom always called me that.  Sometimes I liked it but then there were the times I totally hated it.  After all this princess has a long way to fall if she does not do what her people demand of her.  When my mom died, I announced “No more- no more calling me the princess!”
Today, I took back my Princess in a fun way.  I love to be spoiled, to feel pretty and playful. I also love to help and serve my dear people – my family, my friends, my community and my clients.
This little Princess Kitten had a great time…
I invite you to create a costume that is a part of you that you might miss, even reject, or long to make friends with and have a blast with!
Happy Halloween.
P.S.  George Benson– has a song for you… “This Masquerade.”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i4s9wVRIXeU
Keep it real— LOVE you all!

Searching but not finding… We’re lost in a masquerade.

IMG_2254It’s that time again.  The trick or treaters will come a knocking.  we all have a chance to put on a mask, wear some make-upor go out and find a crazy costume.  I absolutely love Halloween.  Why?  Obviously, I love it because I am a kid at heart and am crazy about play.  I thoroughly enjoy being silly and dressing up.

In fact, I did it a few nights ago.  Meow!  I got to be the princess kitten.  It was absolutely fun.

 

I encourage you to go be a kid.  Let your crazy, pretty, scary YOU come out  and have a great time.  You might even pick a costume that reflects a part of you that you have rejected, secretly love or just miss a little.  Lighten up and enjoy yourself.

I also have some other masks that haunt me throughout the year.  Here are a few of my favorites.

~  The Good Mother

~ The Chameleon

~ The Super Woman who does it all for everybody.

~ The fake smile girl

What are your favorite masks?  What do they hide?   Don’t get lost behind your masquerade.

Happy Halloween

 

 

 

 

 

Perhaps LOVE

I have been pondering on what love means. What I have come to know is that it is not a neatly packaged article… it is a magic that is often not easy to define.

In my life, I humbly admit, that I have tried to tell people how to love. Not my clients, but the victims have been my loved ones. In my own fear, I say “love me like this, or that.” Or say the dreaded words- “If you loved me you would…” Have you ever done that?
Today, I am learning that to be eternally in love, I can choose to love without any constraints. Love someone enough to let them totally be themselves. Imagine that!!

P.S.  To all my past loves- thanks

Loving comes in many ways : Sex is Emotion in Motion

I was out for a drink the other night.  The topic turned to sex!  Yes sex.. why not!  The patrons of the bar had told a group to take the conversation outside because it was ‘offensive ‘.  At about that point, I arrived with my husband.  Being a life coach, I was curious about the excitement outside the door.

They quickly invited us to join in.

One of the men asked me,  “Does a woman like sex more than a man?”  I immediately thought what a loaded question!  I was perhaps going to be attacked from the woman or the men depending on my answer.  I paused and the answer came,  Depends?

That is an honest answer.  Each of us are a unique species.  Each of us have our own magic to share and it comes in many different ways. We bring our set of beliefs and emotions to the life theatre.  Sex is an exciting place where all this magic can be ignited.

With more conversation, it became clear.  Some people, like the patrons saw sex as ‘dirty and not a valued topic’, some wanted to go all out and even talk about swinging, a few saw it as work while others saw it as a loving act of deep intimacy.  Why make any of them wrong?  Each have their unique way of expressing.

In the end it comes down to a few things- Intimacy and pleasure.

Can you let that magical YOU out to play?

Are you ready to be intimate to please another?

Oh and yes- don’t forget yourself in the equation!

Everyone is unique… Loving comes in all kinds of packages.

 

I’m coming out!

“Whatever we refuse to recognize about ourselves has a way of rearing its head and making itself known when we least expect it.”  Debbie Ford

Recently, I had one of those flashes of old memories come flooding through my mind.  I am sure each and every one of you have had them.  They are kinda like a deja vu but then again they are tied to something real and definitely not from today.

This particular memory came knocking on my skull.  I heard it loud and clear while I was going through the routine of rolling and bagging our quilts from our boat prior to our departure.  All seemed rather routine — When wham!  All of a sudden, my mind flashed.  Ok, more like a thunder bolt or current running through me.  I felt weak and sick to my stomach. What the hell!  I took a few deep breaths.   Being trained to know that “all emotions have a message”  – I grabbed a seat and took a  LISTEN!

The ugly memories and emotions came flowing in.

I recalled being a young girl of 9.  My parents sent me off to camp for a week.  I was not like the others, I was really young, skinny and not all that interested in even being there.  But, I was told it would help build character.  So, I went.

We had all kinds of activities including swimming, crafts, sports and hiking.  At night, I secretly cried myself to sleep.  I missed my family and all the comforts of home.  In the morning, we had chores.  I had to roll my sleeping bed tightly, and clean the tent.  We were inspected for efficiency. Each tent was awarded point for good effort.  The winners would be announced on the last day.  Each day, as the camp leaders arrived, we each had to stand, like soldiers behind our beds.  One morning, I was standing still, when the leader noticed my bed was not ‘perfect’ and I had puffy eyes to boot.  She laughed and ordered me to clean pots.  I am dead serious! My fellow roommates were furious!  All the other campers went swimming.    After that, I played ‘good camper’, pleasing everyone.  On the last evening, we had a sing along, dinner and awards night.  It was lots of fun.   We all cheered as our friends won awards.   The last award was being called.  We all listened and they called out my name “Lorraine”  I was so shocked and excited.  I ran to the front and the camp leader said, “congrats”.  I looked at what I had won.  It was ” The worst camper award.”  I felt sick!

So why did I get this flash today?  Why share it with all of you?

I am not a little girl and have lived well, several (ok many) decades!   This memory has a shelf life of about 35 plus years.  So why now?  How can an old memory knock you to your knees today?  Well they can!  I know first hand now!  They are our old shadows coming up to help us make peace.  I know that this memory holds shame and also part of myself that I long ago rejected.  I created a commitment to never fail… and if I did never admit it. Not admitting it was masked by ‘pleasing others’.

I see how I made this mean so much.  Like so many, we only want to see success.  Failure is shameful and totally humiliating.  But, it is part of who we are.

The little girl who had this happen is ME.  I needed to make peace with this part of me.  I needed to see a gift in it too.   I admit, I can fail!  I am coming out… I fail sometimes too! Don’t we all!  🙂

Lots of love and happy trails all…

What did I dream about?

What did I dream about?

If you at 5 could talk, what would she think about your life today? Would she think you play enough, laugh enough, live like she dreamed you would?
Ask –

 

 

 

 

she is listening!

Why build a fortress?

“There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life.”
~John Lennon~

This year, I am making a commitment  to ask critical questions before I act.  I mean, powerful ones that require me to get silent, go inward and follow my heart.

One of the most powerful ones– is birthed out of such a quote from John Lennon.

I commit to ask…

Do I act today from fear or love?

The fear, I talk about here today is not ‘healthy fear’.  I believe, ‘healthy fear’, the kind that protects you from harm, is indeed birthed from love always.

The fear I am calling myself on is NOT that type.

This fear comes from the past always.  It is NEVER forward thinking.

When I act from fear- I know it!

It is not guided from my inner heart but from my ego.  Internally, I don’t trust myself and not even my source.  From this fearful state, I can make all kinds of excuse, become paralyzed, get real mad, blame others and cut off my love.  Have you ever done that?

Sure you have!

I shrink inside.  I feel it internally.  It keeps me from acting from my authentic self and source.

Do you find that fear is becoming the ‘normal’ in your life?  Do you secretly remain grounded in your past, terrified the same might happen again?  Be honest?  Has this ever happened?   Sure it has!   All of us do it… from our humanity.  But, divinely, we can move towards love.  Indeed, as John Lennon stressed, we can evolve.  We can accept, be imperfect and create!

REMEMBER FEAR Void of LOVE will build walls.

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I recently heard someone say, “I will NEVER date again.”  I asked why.  She said, ” I need space to just feel safe and be myself.”     Sounds perfectly reasonable – right?   But, when I invited her to go deeper inward, She discovered the fortress she was building was not comfortable – it was cold, empty and lonely (kinda like the marriage she left behind.)  Interesting! With time, she began to see she could live safely through love.  Today, she is happily dating someone AND lovingly setting boundaries to have quality time alone.

When we live through LOVE we expand.  Life supports us… ALWAYS!

Don’t build a fortress from FEAR– build your life with LOVE.

Always keep your playful spirit!

Lorraine Rey

Do you remember being a little girl or boy?

Playing in the sandbox, riding your bike full force down an enormous hill, climbing a tree… blowing bubbles out of your nose!

Yes, you know you have done it all. I have!

I used to climb a big, old tree out in the front yard.  I would sit up there and listen (ok spy) on those that walked by.  I heard stories of wives sharing their intimate stories of sex, of an old man ranting to himself about his bills and many, many more.  I would giggle with delight.  BTW – never shared any stories I heard.  It was silly but so much fun!

I used to dance on the ledge of our patio porch.  It was deemed dangerous by my parents, but that just made it more of an adventure.  At night, I’d sneak out with three flashlights.  Each time…

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Your choice is waiting to be made.

Today, as promised, I share my list of MY feelings around

an EXTRAORDINARY and ORDINARY LIFE.

My Ordinary (uninspired) Life:

yawn,boring,ugh!
yawn,boring,ugh!

CLUES that I am locked in my ordinary (uninspired) life:

I am always

TIRED

LONELY

HUNGRY FOR MORE

FEELING POWERLESS

INSECURE

OVERLY ANGRY OR ANNOYED

FILLED WITH LACK

AND ALWAYS SEARCHING OUT THERE FOR SOMETHING MORE.

My secret thoughts:

I secretly whisper,

“ Life is so unfair, I can’t do it, I am too tired, too stupid, too lazy.”

“I long for someone to fix it.”

  “I wish it all to go away”

… But my resistance to in only births more… Exhaustion and more.

My results:

My life remains ordinary.  I often feel exhausted (for no apparent reason), very annoyed and frustrated by all around me.  My world becomes a reflection of all that is within me.  I may be smiling but inside I am not living.

The more I fight this circumstance, the more it shows up…ordinary?

Sound pathetic?  it is.  AND yes, I have experienced EVERYONE of these feelings.

Have you?

The question is How long to stay there?

NOW I imagine

My Extraodinary Life:

laugh, love,live..no matter what!
laugh, love,live..no matter what!

CLUES I am living an extraordinary life:

My life is blessed and each experience has a rich lesson.

My mind, body and spirit soar with endless possibility.

I am free to express myself fully, and lovingly.

I laugh,smile,sing,dance,cry…feel it all!

My secret thoughts:

I openly can express gratitude.

I know I am an inspiration.

I accept all that I am.

I feel safe, and connected to the magic of our lives.

My results:

Free to serve others

Free to express my truth

Free to be me

Open to new possibilities

Joyous

Authentic

Listening to and following my heart

Much reverence for life.

When each of us makes a choice to live an extraordinary life now, we move forward towards positve outcomes.  We no longer see the world through lack.  Challenges will continue to arise but through our inspired view, we can see possibility.

Choose YOUR extraordinary everyday.

Much love always!

AN EXTRAORDINARY LIFE- REALLY???

Make it EXTRAORDINARY!

So this year, I want to speak about EXTRAORDINARY LIVES.

I was watching a documentary on famous people and their extraordinary lives.  How did it happen for them?  What did they do or believe?  I personally believe it starts with our own beliefs always.  We can have all the best intentions BUT our beliefs and commitments move us forward or keep us stuck right where we are.

Think about an EXTRAORDINARY LIFE.  Imagine it now.

Are you living one?

Be honest… What was the first thing you heard inside yourself when you read the question?

For most, we say a weak yes, sorta or flat out hell No!  We  compare ourselves ,right away, to someone else who we see as extraordinary and then measure ourselves.  Something else, we are great at making excuses, beating ourselves up for past failures, using past as evidence for why we can’t and ultimately convincing ourselves that EXTRAORDINARY is for others.

But, guess what the clock is ticking… WHEN is YOUR time for EXTRAORDINARY?

So today I invite you to make a list of what YOUR EXTRAORDINARY LIFE would look like.   Use words that evoke passion and feelings.

Also, write a list of what is an ORDINARY (or uninspiring) LIFE.

Again, use words that evoke emotions.

Now look at both. Which one will move you into your best life NOW?  What is keeping you from getting there?

I know my answer…

In a few days, I will share my lists.  I also will share what has got in my way too.  Stay tuned.

Wish you an extraordinary life.

For one day…

For one day…

Don’t say or think anything negative

Smile

Say thank you to everyone who does something for you

Use words of appreciation

Acknowledge yourself for all your greatness

AND

Only look at the day through eyes of full potential.

What would your world look like in one day- if you did this for one day?

Control Freak!

Part of loving yourself is being able to accept all of you.  I mean ALL!  It is when we reject part of ourselves that we become unauthentic.  All of us are a collection of dark and light.  But, from a young age we learn to judge part of ourselves as wrong, bad or even down right evil.  Have you ever done that?  I have!

In our pursuit to not BE something we begin to judge others.  In reality, we are judging ourselves THROUGH the lens of our view of others.

We see rejected part of ourselves in others.  He is so ______.  She is so ____!   Add your own rejected part here!  Here are some of mine.  Bitch, Control Freak, Crazy Person, Mad Wife, Loser.

I currently am learning to accept that     I am a control freak!   ouch- this is hard to write or even say.

I admit it.  Lorraine is a CONTROL FREAK!

Of course, I need to explain more.  This part of me is something I never wanted to say, be, nor wanted anyone else to know. (alittle secret- everyone already knew!)

I saw it in my ex, in my children and in my friends.  But heck not in me!  My closest friends would laugh!  They have seen it forever.  But of course, the person you can’t see in room is yourself!  That is why the universe gives you mirror of others.

So today, I admit — I control!  I can freakily control, especially when scared.

When I look deeper, I can also so why?  Fear is at the root.    I control to feel safe.

The antidote to avoid this cycle of rejection  is to lovingly accept.

I see the gift in control.  I have learned to let be… to trust the blessed beauty of nature and universe.   Now control does not need to control me.

I am Mad about me!

What do you reject in yourself?  find it.. love it.. and let it be.  Don’t reject anything for all has a beautiful gift within it!

Something wrong?

In our life, we will always have things go ‘wrong’.  But it is what we do with afterwards that is important.  Have you ever had the experience of making mistakes?  Of course, you have!  I know from my own conditioned responses, I have gone into either blaming others or beating myself.  Ultimately, neither lead to solutions.

I invite you to read this very timely article…www.oprah.com/spirit/Deepak-Chopra-Advice-Handling-Hard-Times

“Much of the stress that…

“Much of the stress that people feel
doesn’t come from having too much to do.
It comes from not finishing what they’ve started.”
~ David Allen

What have you started that needs to be finished in your life?

How long do you usually wait to get things done?

What stands in your way?

How much longer do you want t keep doing it this way?

 

 

Pourquoi se casser la tête?

Translation:  why break your head?  WORRY!!!

Just have a look at this monkey.  Tired? Lonely? Bored?

I found him hidden amongst the throngs of tourists,in a quaint village called Pezenas, in the South of France.

This weary soul showed me the effects of a ‘broken head’… exhausted by worry or some dis-ease. His head lays heavily upon his enormous hand, while his eyes half closed seem disconnected from all who pass.  Even his torso, which hold his loving heart is broken.

Yet, on closer glance, I see a hint of something more still, even more tranquil.  Perhaps, his head could mend and he could return to his intended state of calm.  Isn’t that a bit like us? Don’t we all need to return to our inner calm?

Just now close your eyes and imagine yourself as a sculpture.  Focus in carefully.  Take the time to note the materials your are made of. What size are you? What is your expression? What is your sculpture trying to say about you?

Now imagine your worried self as a sculpture.  What would you look like?  How might worry – ‘breaking your head’ about life effect you and others who see you?

Mr. Monkey here seems exhausted, bored and maybe just feeling a bit like dead wood!

So why the hell do we continue to do it?

How do we breathe life into that ‘broken head’?

I’d love to hear from you!

Let’s share…  for now  Peace and Love to you!

Surrender

 

 

Image

Moving , rolling, running, stretching 

Feeling free. 
Into the day, the night, the moment, 
any moment without reservation or hesitation. 

Letting anything, everything, all or none. 
Just move, glide and ride the motion. 
Trusting nothing, expecting anything. 
Being free to evolve. 

Riding a stream that knows no boundaries, 
has no rules to break or make 
Can move you to be serious, silly, light or tight. 
Showing true colours or none at all. 

Free to run from all that is or could or must be. 
Then abandoning yourself only to find more of all that is part 
of what is bigger or smaller than the imagination could see. 

Touching the ecstasy of our realness 
Then fall into the abyss of nothing. 
Darkeness and Light at any moment. 

Feeling everything or be numb to all. 
To have the courage to cry, to smile or spit and yell. 
Something moves all or nothing as we continue to feel. 

 

 

More on happiness.. :)

So many of us learn to believe that we will be happy- when, or if or by!

Ask yourself-

Is it worth waiting to be happy?  Why not now?  Even if your life is filled with ‘hard times’ can a little happiness fill your day?  What would change if you felt happy?  Have you seen someone who has done this?  If so, how has their happiness influenced you or others?

Makes me smile just thinking about it!

But,  when I am totally honest with myself, I admittedly have done the internal talk of  “I will be happy when or if “.  I have said, ” I will be happy when I am done with the divorce or when I pay off all those bills.”  Thanks to a very kind friend who kicked my butt, I released the old pattern of thinking that way.   What kind of old believe keeps you from being fully happy?

I believe that when we recognize an old pattern, we are given an opportunity to change it.  Otherwise, we are destined to repeat the same old, same old… on and on. Sound fun?

The other day while having some medical tests, I saw several people in wheelchairs.  Some looked in bad pain.  One lady struck me as extremely happy even though she had tubes coming out of her arm and may have something very serious.  The point of this is she had a choice.  We all do.  Each and every day we can focus on being happy or not.

I am coming to understand that happiness truly needs to be there regardless of life circumstances.  We can remain positive even during tough times.  Perhaps, this happiness will ultimately draw us towards more happiness.

Here is an interesting video, I found to support what I am learning.

Please enjoy…  Let me know what you think?  Much love and continued happiness always!

The Happiness Solution

Looking for the magic potion.

Image

Thank you, merci,danke u,ありがとう,hvala, gracias,спасибо,谢谢,!

Doesn’t it feel good?  It does not matter where you are from, how rich or poor you are, if you are old or young it is healing!  And yes, it feels so good.  Not just to you but all involved.  Simple yet amazing! It is a gift that costs nothing.

I don’t think I need to remind anyone that today is Thanks Giving Day in the U.S.

But, I do feel that this day has an immense power.  This magical day is truly about gratitude…and that is the magic potion that brings smiles to someone’s face, warms up our hearts and connects us all!

So, I guess the BIGGER question is…How can we keep this magic alive each and every day?

Don’t you want to bring smiles to someone’s face each day?  Would you like to connect more deeply?  Do you want to hold this feeling of gratitude and share it with others?

My friends, we really can do this!  We all did it today, right?  Well, we have the magic to do it each day.

Each day simply give thanks and praise.  Simple!

Really make a conscious effort to do it.  Each morning make a list of things you are grateful for and finish each day by writing more.  Even a seemingly ‘bad’ event or ‘difficult person’ can be something to be grateful for.  Try it!

Take the time to say thank-you at least five times each day.  Go further and relate to those people with genuine gratitude.  Let them know—really know!  It can change everything.  Speak from your heart… see what happens!

I sincerely believe that being grateful brings more happiness to everyone’s life.  Personally, I find when I focus on my blessings; I have a more positive attitude and much greater ability to problem solve.  Really, think about it!   When you look at any situation from a place of lack or making it wrong you only create a barrier.  You resent, you blame and live more in fear.  In gratitude, I find I see every situation as a gift.  This opens me up to new possibilities.

Giving thanks also improves your relationships.  Try it!  Say thank you and watch your life change.  Simple yes!  Sometimes hard to do… sure!  Especially those days when your son, daughter, partner or coworker is driving you crazy.  You never know that crazy day might be a blessing you never could have imagined.  So give gratitude anyways!  It just might have the potential to have immense impact.

Having gratitude is all about attitude. Make it your greatest gift…adopt this attitude, choice  and habit.  Everything you do comes back… with that

I give thanks to all of you!  Each one of you is magical.  🙂

Much love always Lorraine

“Il faut tourner… Roll Baby Roll

“Il faut tourner sept fois sa langue dans sa bouche avant de parler”

Sounds foreign?

It is too many!

But this is not the case for my family.
I lived with this expression each day at home.

So what does it mean?
Turn your tongue seven times in your mouth prior to speaking.

Why now?

Gives you time!

Ok, confession! I didn’t do this so well in the past. Got better with lots of practice and time.

Recently, my loose tongue forgot to roll and I spoke without thinking!
In a single moment of choice, I didn’t take that pause, and spoke to
quickly causing myself to compromise my best intentions. Anyone done that? Sure you have! We all have.

But imagine if you could do this “roll” and just take time. TIME to pause, TIME to think, TIME to make a best choice. Really imagine this.

Fortunately for me, my error was not too grave. I heard my mother loud and clear, (insert French accent)
Lorraine, tourner ta langue sept fois!!!”
My mom has passed on but her wisdom remains in my heart and mind.

A little history:

In France, this is a well know expression. Its history goes back very far.
In the Bible, Solomon said as follows: “The wise man turns seven times
his tongue in his mouth before speaking.” In other words, the idea of
the wise one who reflects prior speaking goes back a very long time.

In my childhood home, harsh words were not encouraged. Nonetheless, we had the occasional arguments. I mean sometimes knock down battles amongst my sisters and I. Who hasn’t?

Rolling was one way to tame the situation. Crazy but true!

When the words began to fly and tempers to soar, Mom would instruct us to roll.
Sometimes she encouraged us to use this process when we had gossip in our mouth or bitterness in our hearts. It was even useful when we had just poor intentions that would serve no one.

This method of rolling is not completely like the American’s “We will wash your mouth out with soap.” Thankfully, I have never tasted soap. Even though, I resented it at times. I now find the process more meaningful. It actually taught me to slow down, think and just breathe. I need that sometimes.

Let’s get practical:

Try turning your tongue seven times now! I mean it. It is not that
easy. It takes focus and coordination for some. Me!!! Don’t be shy, it took me years to master.

It can also look pretty darn silly. Doesn’t it seem like nonsense? Being silly can move you right out of the stress of conflict or poor condition choices too.

But,trust me, it works. Every time I have used this idea and done it, I
avoid saying things I regret. Rolling gives me time to collect my
thoughts and be congruent. It gets me out of the story, drama and
reactions in the moment. Silly yet Amazing!

Do you have the courage to try to be a tongue roller:

Think Roll – when you get into automatic response mode.
Roll if you must ‘seven times’
Please go ahead and try to pause before speaking.
Take time to reflect on what you will say.
Ask will it help you or hinder you.
Does this move you to your best choices and vision?
You will be astonished at what will change.

Roll on my friends!

PS: Why 7?

no idea!

7 dwarfs
lucky number 7
7 colors of the rainbow
7 notes on a scale
7 deadly sins
7 sacraments

Humbled by the crazies…

      Here’s to the crazy ones.
      The misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers.
      The round pegs in the square holes.
      The ones who see things differently.
      They’re not fond of rules.
      And they have no respect for the status quo.
      You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them.
      About the only thing you can’t do is ignore them.
      Because they change things.
      They push the human race forward.
      While some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius.
      Because the people who think they are crazy enough to change the world…
          are the ones who do.

 

 

    Steve Jobs
    Thank you for all you did for the world… I am humbled!

Songs to inspire you…

I was sifting through all my music today and came across so many songs.  It was so much fun just playing them.  Some reminded me of times when I was young and innocent.  Others, took me back to places of pain.  Still more brought smiles across my face.  Music has that power to pull us towards our truth.

All of a sudden, I came across a song that fit perfectly for some of the work I am internally doing right now.  I have used the things in this song to keep me from embracing all that I am.

I thought I’d share this with all of you.

Enjoy the music in your heart!  Let it lead you to your perfect song for today.

Be well- xoxo Lorraine

40 came today

40 came in a day.  

She crept into my world before I had danced with thirty.  She was here and it was time to let her in.

What did 40 look like, act like, feel like?  What the hell did she want from me?  Would I like her, want to grow old with her?  Before I could answer she flung the front door open and stared  directly at and through  me.

A tall, confident, self-assured vixen dressed in a two thousand dollar Armani suit said, “Hello.”  The splash of perfume combined artfully with translucent applications of make-up gave the distinct appearance of a woman who wears her age well.

With both feet firmly planted on my tattered old carpet, I knew she was a woman who had always known what she wanted, had a cleared the way, blazed her path and was damn proud of ever breath she had taken.  The type of specimen of a Lady that all the men secretly longed for  “Qualities of a Catch” list.

I took her coat and showed her to my living room.  She said, ” Nice home.”     I picked up the left over chips and stale beer from my coffee table.

“Thanks, I like it,” I replied.

40 looked familiar like a character from a movie or a model on those lame commercials on T.V.  The ones where the gal gets her face on in five, runs a marathon, closes a deal and gets to top it off dining with a hunky Brad Pitt look-alike.    She’s visited my nightmares too!

We sat for a few–what seemed like forever.

I invited 40 to have some tea.  She declined.  Why the hell was she staying here?  Did no one else want her or need her?

The bitch was using me.  She’d suck the life right out of me — if I let her.  Yet, I courteously showed her to her room and bid her a good might.  But still she haunted my mind.

As 40 undressed,  she revealed a tight-assed, soft bellied Diva.  Her skin was soft and her breasts firm.  She masterfully displayed the hard efforts of her dutiful exercise at the local gym.  40’s lips, her eyes. her smile, the contours of her cheeks collectively mirrored a youthful blended harmoniously with only the goodness, the wisdom that her age had offered.  The occasional facial lines served to imprint a moment of joy, of clarity of perfect.

40 looked in the mirror and it reflected a Rembrandt, a Degas and a Da Vinci.  She was a masterpiece of a reality molded by her mind and the mind’s of those she loved and hated too.

40 looked deeper for what seemed the first time.  She saw 40 at 20 at 10 at 5.  Putting her hands to her face, she cried out with fear.

She too was that innocent child who forgot to brush her teeth, comb her hair and forgot to say please or thank you.  The one who spent hours in the vegetable garden sculpting mud pies with her mother’s wooden spoon.  The memories flashed throwing her off course.  She felt the time she had a face full of zits and couldn’t bear to go to the school prom… Or more honestly — No one wanted to take her.  She remembered crying herself to sleep when she got an ‘F’ on her history paper.

40 let the shell break and something hauntingly familiar occurred  —

A warm tear trickled down her masked face.  She let the child dirty her clothes, let the youth dance and twirl in the hot sun.  40 smiled and for what seemed the first time felt alive!

—-

Lessons from Nature

Today,  I had one of those exciting days.  Not out with friends, not holding my lovers hand, nor having a bubble bath.  I was doing the deadly duty of ripping out two months of over grown weeds in my yard.  That’s what I get for leaving the country for a few months.  I am not here to complain about it.  I actually had a lot of fun and got a good work out in for free!  Bonus!

As I stared down some monster weeds.  I am talking about the ones that are taller than I am.  Heck some of them looked like they had grown arms.  I started to think why do we have weeds anyways.  I had nothing come to mind.  Well except, so I can cuss and yell.  So I can take out my frustrations on these innocent creepers.  Though they are relentless, you might find it amazing how tenacious they are!

Actually, by definition, any plant that is a nuisance is a weed.  I finally, after many hours made peace with my weeds even had a respect for their strength.  Heck, could I have the courage to grow so tall and be so strong in a place where few welcomed me?

I think they came to mean something more to me today.

In France, there is an expression,  ” The bad herb always push up faster.”  Isn’t that the truth; Our own nuisances tend to become bigger in our minds, even can twist and turn all vibrancy out of a day, year or even a moment.  These nuisances are of our own making.  Our perceptions, our judgements, and criticisms.  They can rob us of fertile soil and the appreciation in a moment.  Maybe, we have a choice to make peace with our own weeds too.  Like the weeds – they push up… and we can gentle appreciate them and let them go.

I did that with all the weeds today.  Nature has a way of teaching us so much.

Feel free to share your stories from nature.

Shunryu Suzuki, the Zen master, is credited with proclaiming,

“For Zen students, a weed is a treasure.”

Surfin for Love

There are days when you just don’t feel good.  This was one of them.  I had a wicked headache and just hurt everywhere.  I also really am aware that I miss my boyfriend and his girls, who live on the other side of the world.   (if any of you have a long distance relationship please let me know how it works for you!)

So, I decided to embrace my illness and simply relax today. I surfed the net!  Surfed lots… but with purpose and direction.  I wanted to share something of meaning or beauty with all of you.  Here is something I truly found inspirational.  Let me know if you agree!

Is it so? If so.. so what now?

Is it so?

The other day, I heard someone get  very upset because she was cut from an interview process.  She immediately went into the shaming and self-loathing stance.

Here is what it sounded like:

I am not good enough.

They probably had another candidate in mind.

I suck at interviews.

I will never find a job.

The story went on and on and on…  The result was anger, frustration, belittling and feelings of insecurity.  This victimizing may have a short-term fix for her.  But….

Is this consistent with her goal?  How does this attitude make anything easier?  Will this perspective help her build confidence for the next opportunity?

I am sure each one of you can relate.  I sure can.

I have hundreds of situations in life where I have immediately cast judgment.

The criticism generally was pointed right at me.

The truth is I knew very little and made a whole story out of it.  In some cases, I carried that story for years.  Have you ever done that?

This is a risky place to be.  These stories become our bases of an inaccurate reality.  It is the actual seed of self-sabotaging.  We begin to believe our stories and limit our potentials.

There are healthier perspectives.

Ask yourself these questions:

What is certain here?  Her answer is the interviewer never called back. (Stop! Don’t add anything more.  Not because he… or because I… only the facts)

What can I do?  Focus on actions and thoughts that inspire you to achieve what you desire.  She can review her options.  Call them back and get the facts, spruce up her resume, and decide what she can improve on.

How can I support myself now?

This is the most important step.  It takes practice to keep doing this.

IMAGINE being supported and loved now.  Make a list of supportive thoughts and actions.  Be there for yourself.  Own them!

The next time you have a disappointment, choose to stay positive and support yourself!  You will be amazed at the results… more peace and confidence.

Let’s look inside and feel!

“What does it mean to know and experience my own nothingness? It is not enough to turn away in disgust from my illusions and faults and mistakes, to separate myself from them as if they were not, and as if I were someone other than myself. This kind of self-annihilation is only a worse illusion, it is a pretended humility which, by saying “I am nothing” I mean in effect “I wish I were not what I am.”

Thomas Merton

Imagine what we would feel if we could look inside and celebrate every part of ourselves!

I mean absolutely love all of it.

The imperfect, the broken, the depressed, the angry, the sexy, the sensitive, the romantic, the shy, the irritable, the stubborn, the bored, the lovable or stuck parts of you.

Celebrate it all!

Some of the greatest discoveries, the greatest songs, the greatest moments of intimacy have come from truly embracing our authentic self.

Look inside- feel- CELEBRATE!

EXCUSES,EXCUSES,EXCUSES!

So, some of you might have noticed that I dropped off the face of the world.  Well at least off this blog.  I believe, I was and am still kickin very well! So here I am.

I sat here thinking;  What do I write? What do I say and how do I explain my absence?

My defensive self  began to immediately declare all the excuses I could muster.

Here are a few for your amusement:

I was lost for weeks in a sea of love and almost drowned.

I was abducted by the French Mafia. ( but they surrendered me)

I ate amazing food and drank fine wine until I felt so filled with absolute bliss.

It was too damn hot here to write.

I laughed until four in the morning and was crazy silly.

I spent time in the hospital.

I tried to become a groupie with the Tour de France teams… ( I liked the yellow jersey)

I slept in, played hard, made love, and soaked in the beauty.

I simply forgot to do it.

I felt absolutely lazy!

I attended a workshop where no cellphones nor labtops were permitted.  Is that possible in today’s world?

I went into a deep place of inner reflection.  Scary sometimes!

It is his fault, her fault, the dog’s fault.

I lost my inspiration.  Well, it went on vacation too!  Let me know if you find it.

I felt guilty for not writing and then — you guessed it… ate more guilt and did not write.

Lists and lists came up for me… more excuses… BUT time to get real.

The most true to my heart is..I own that I just needed a break..

Do you  see all the excuses that you tell yourself?  The ones that keep you from being or doing what brings you love and happiness.  You are worth it .  Do you know that?  You are! We all are!

What excuses do you tell yourself?  Make a list today.  Challenge your excuses. Have fun with them.

lots of love, Lo

What labels do you wear?

What labels do you wear?

Many years ago, I was an elementary school teacher.  I taught a wonderful class of second graders.  Each day, I felt inspired and truly loved my work.

In this particular class, I had a student named Jan.  He came from a family of 8 children.  To say the least, his home was always filled with activity and he was often left to fend for himself.  Though his parents loved him dearly, their life was stretched!

During class time, Jan would often drift off and daydream.  He had much trouble focusing and hence his grades suffered.  He was only 8 years old!  At the end of our first quarter, we (the parents, principal and myself) decided to have some assessments done.  A psychologist administered the tests and brought her findings to all of us.  She told the family, that Jan was challenged and slow; Jan was going to have challenges reading and doing logical processes; Jan’s family should consider directing towards programs that lead him into careers where he could ‘use his hands’.  I was amazed that one test could predict Jan’s life with such precision.

Imagine the effects that it could have on someone like Einstein who didn’t speak until he was four and also did not read until seven.  His teachers viewed him as mentally challenged and anti-social.  I am not sure what happened to Jan, but I know his family decided to reject the findings.  We decided, as a team, to support him, especially by giving him time to feel valued- in the class and at home.  He slowly but surely began to flourish.

In our lives, we need to be careful of the labels we put on others and ourselves.   Each day, when I awake I have a choice.  So do you!  What do you label yourself?

Look at these two columns:  I invite you to take time to read the words-and really feel them.

Stupid, slow, dumb Smart, capable, intelligent
Ugly, Fat, too thin, plain Beautiful, healthy, unique, sexy
Old, incapable, stuck, Young, capable, motivated
Fearful, naive, limited, disappointed Fearless, faithful, trusting, passionate

Which is more inviting and inspiring?  Do any fit the labels you put on yourself?  Think of your own list… does it work for you?

When I label myself- I also begin to create an army of excuses to justify my labels.  I say things like:  I am too old.  Maybe tomorrow!  I have not the skills or ability.  People may laugh at me so forget it!  Or my favorite- I don’t know what I want to do.  So, guess what I don’t try anything. On and on…  we go!

Have you told yourself things that keep you from shining?  What would it take for you to just go for all the gold – the joy, peace, and passion– whatever you see as your gifts?

Start today!

Create a plan and implement the realness of your genuine desires.

with love, Lorraine

P.S:  A few people who have inspired and changed the world!

http://www.onlinecollege.org/2010/02/16/50-famously-successful-people-who-failed-at-first/

A lazy summer day to find inspiration!

  “It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.”

J.K Rowling

In the last few days, I have been in my own world… relaxing and being totally lazy!  Lazy is a word I secretly hate and often project onto others.  Heck, NOT me!  But,  I can be a lazy person too.  I admit this.  Can’t you?

Now, my nature , when lazy, is to quickly become ultra-critical of myself.  I internally say,”‘Bad girl, you need to do something meaningful.”

I am not  advocating being lazy each and every day.   I acknowledge that the only person who can decide if it is right for me is ME!  That is the same for you!  So I guess- I made the choice to play lazy for a day.  I may not have this luxury tomorrow.

Do you find that you can be lazy some days?  Are you too lazy?  Are you too driven?  What do you get out of being lazy?  Does being lazy keep you from being, doing, or becoming something?  Do you embrace ‘your laziness’ sometimes or do you shame it?

This little exercise in laziness was most interesting for me.

I, at first, felt entitled.  Then, after a day of it, I felt guilt.  Yes guilt!  I told myself you ‘lazy bum, get up.’

Ultimately now, I decided to move on from being lazy. Believe me- I truly embraced it for the whole day!  I felt absolutely — No guilt, no shame.    But, an interesting thing happened… after a period of laziness (honoring it), I felt motivated to act with intention.

What now?  After rest and fun, do I want to just get busy? I mean the usual doing, doing, and doing.  Even on vacation- I can fall prey to this attitude.  Just to do it!  I am like the energizing bunny; I  can jump right into go.  Have you ever been there, done that?

I decided to do things with a different motivation.  To do it because they are important to me and others I love?  These choices, even the smallest ones, make a big difference to me.  I made a choice to do actions with purpose.  Choices that empower me, move me, inspire others, help someone, or just feel right.  So today, I am helping someone to get their garden done.  🙂  Hard work but meaningful!

Exercising healthy choices is important and very empowering.   Just like doing the daily run or going to the gym to get in shape. exercising intentional choices (from the smallest to the biggest ones) is habit building.  I know when I feel that I am making choices that matter, I feel more involved and frankly even more alive.  What do you feel when you do things with full intention?

Imagine, what would your day  look like?  What choices would you make today?

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