Control Freak!

Part of loving yourself is being able to accept all of you.  I mean ALL!  It is when we reject part of ourselves that we become unauthentic.  All of us are a collection of dark and light.  But, from a young age we learn to judge part of ourselves as wrong, bad or even down right evil.  Have you ever done that?  I have!

In our pursuit to not BE something we begin to judge others.  In reality, we are judging ourselves THROUGH the lens of our view of others.

We see rejected part of ourselves in others.  He is so ______.  She is so ____!   Add your own rejected part here!  Here are some of mine.  Bitch, Control Freak, Crazy Person, Mad Wife, Loser.

I currently am learning to accept that     I am a control freak!   ouch- this is hard to write or even say.

I admit it.  Lorraine is a CONTROL FREAK!

Of course, I need to explain more.  This part of me is something I never wanted to say, be, nor wanted anyone else to know. (alittle secret- everyone already knew!)

I saw it in my ex, in my children and in my friends.  But heck not in me!  My closest friends would laugh!  They have seen it forever.  But of course, the person you can’t see in room is yourself!  That is why the universe gives you mirror of others.

So today, I admit — I control!  I can freakily control, especially when scared.

When I look deeper, I can also so why?  Fear is at the root.    I control to feel safe.

The antidote to avoid this cycle of rejection  is to lovingly accept.

I see the gift in control.  I have learned to let be… to trust the blessed beauty of nature and universe.   Now control does not need to control me.

What do you reject in yourself?  find it.. love it.. and let it be.  Don’t reject anything for all has a beautiful gift within it!