Imperfectly loved

We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.

Sam Keen

This quote I saw on my daughter’s blog.  Decided to share it here.

I am curious —

 Gentlemen:   What do you look for in a person you love?

Ladies:  What do you look for in a person you love?

Do you think we think alike?

MUCH LOVE TO ALL ALWAYS!

Secret in the Garden

“One’s action ought to come out of an achieved stillness: not to be mere rushing on.”

D.H. Lawrence

For the last few days, I have been walking in parks, riding my bike, listening to the birds and appreciating the chirping of the cicadas (this used to annoy me!).  Sometimes, I found myself feeling a deep connection and appreciation for the beauty of the world – just as it is.  A stillness started to come over me.  This place of solitude is my secret garden; the place where I can feel authentic and truly honor all that I am.  Sound silly?  Not to me.  

In my life, I have been driven by a need to always be doing!  Doing to the point of exhaustion at times.  I have internally owned a faulty belief that I must appear busy and do no matter what.  Otherwise, I will be known as lazy or a major procrastinator!  Ironically, I can be lazy and truly enjoy those moments too.  

Rushing on in my life has been one of moving into auto-pilot – doing just to do, doing out of obligation, and on and on.  So strange to admit but I think rushing around has kept me and maybe you too from having focus, direction and purpose.  You think?

Have you ever stopped and asked yourself the following question. Why do you the things you do?

Is it out of passion, joy, obligation, survival or old programming? What if we could slow down and honor our days more fully?  What might your day look like?  

Get still – right now!  Really still and let yourself feel what that might be like.  

 Would anything change?  How might you engage with your family, yourself, your colleagues and others along the way?  FEEL this!

 I am not going to forget to return to my secret garden.  What does yours look and feel like? Imagine feeling free enough, calm enough  to be fully present with all that you see.  I can’t help to believe that this stillness would lead to more authentic living and more purposeful actions.  

Just what the doctor ordered: A day of nothing but rest!

I was very sick yesterday!  A hospital visit was the result.    Thanks to all the doctors, nurses and especially  my boyfriend who took good care of me.

Some believe – what you resist persists!  I was really resisting the pain.   It went on and on… and finally the result was my boyfriend dragging me to the doctors.  (ok- I was resisting that too)  but when I let go and just accepted it… It did help.  I coped better when I let others help me.

Today I am not full of any thoughts. In fact, I am still very tired.

I was resting and  listening to a few of my favorite musical artists.

Who do you think are great artists?  Which ones have pure talent?  I love artists who can be ‘authentic.’

I personally love the music of Adelle and Bob Dylan.

Here is a song for you!    Feel free to write a comment and post a song for all of us to share!  Your songs will cheer me up.

I think, I think too much!

Many, many years ago… too many to say, I dated a boy named Don.  He lived about 200 km away from me in Canada.  We talked lots on the phone, wrote letters and saw each other on occasion.  I worried about lots!   What is he doing when I am not there?  Will we last?  ….and on and on and on….

Ok, so to make a long story short – we broke up!  When we did, he gave me a letter- it was called “I think, you think to much.”  I found that letter last year, while cleaning out my rather messy garage.  He talked about enjoying ‘us’, our time together and our special memories.   Oh and this was all pre. Eckhart Tolle and Self Help sections in bookstores. I admit it!  He was right!  Still is!

This week, during one of our long visits while eating with my boyfriend, I heard him say the EXACT same words, “Lorraine, I think, you think too much.” (insert a French accent here!)   I laughed.  But, darn it is so true.

Thinking can be over rated!  I can take apart a situation and try it on from every perspective.  Do you think that is useful?  Maybe!

But, digging deeper– I ask why do it?  What do I feel when I worry or think a problem to death?  Is it out of fear? Is it because I can’t surrender?  HA– see  think,think,think!

Someone close to me, once said, if you want to climb the mountain and you are at the base, don’t look to the peak.  You must just be with each step, each action. Otherwise, if you focus on the peak- you will go straight back to bed!

How many times have you worried or over thought situations?  What is the result?  Do you become paralyzed and want to go to bed too? I have to admit-  I feel exhausted just thinking about it.

I can only think that I would be able to be a better mother, friend, lover and citizen.  All of you who care for me, would feel a sigh of relief to have it stop!  🙂

Imagine how much energy is lost in worry. Can we be gentle, still and trust life a little more? What would this feel like?  Imagine putting those exaggerated  thoughts down? Liberating isn’t it!

mmm… it is early here- I am going out to just be!   Soak in the beauty of the morning sun, feel the wind and give thanks… allowing what comes to come.  You know, that FEELS good!

What makes a good dinner?

Last night, I had a fabulous dinner with three courses and desert, some good wine and delightful conversation.   Such a romantic evening!

Here in France, dinner is typically not served until later in the evening; it is very common to eat around 8 or even 9 pm.  In North America,  that would be consider ‘absurd!”  I definitely thought that.  After all, I always believed if you eat too late, it is assured all the extra calories will follow you right into your bed.  Then, slowly but surely, they will deposit themselves on your hips and thighs!  But… from my vantage here in the South of France, I don’t see many people with excessive weight… so what the heck???

As others and I see it, we have had so much more stress in our lives.  The pressures of career, family, relationships can be overwhelming.   Admittedly, I have used food as a pacifier!  It has been a very fast fix to deal with my lives issues.  I eat my troubles away or eat fast to get it over with.  So silly!

Don’t you think that we also can use food for self-gratification?   I know on any street corner,  I can get a quick fix, fuel fast, eat cheap and heck do so all in mega- super sized portions!  Honestly, when I indulge in this behavior of excess, I am doing it out of habit.  Oh and then guess what happens?  I get a diet of guilt! You guessed it… I go back to the gym or diet.   Now, I am asking myself — – what is more absurd — Late night eating or fast food indulgence?

I think, the French do know something about the fine art of eating!   The secret is Pleasure!  Last night was pleasurable.  In fact, each night is so.  Even the dinner at home is done with care, with intention and time is given to conversation and sharing.

So I am learning to view eating as one of lives pleasures!  To feel pleasure when eating is nourishing and refreshing!

Can we relish in it without overindulgence?

Join me by exciting all the senses, eating with a sense of proportion, selecting healthily, savoring each bite and being fully sensual.    This is a way of being…

Enjoy a pleasurable evening of eating each and every day!

jet lag

Jet Lag is an amazing feeling.  I thought I would be lag proof but NON!   Last night during dinner-  I almost feel asleep;  during the watching of a fabulous tennis match- ditto!  I have never awaited my bed like like last night.  So now this morning I am much more alert.  Plan to get out and enjoy the new day!

I will write more later…. when I find my way on this foreign computer… until I get educated on this keyboard – I am a mess! Where is the question marks- commas- oh no q is where a used to be –  etc…..help! I am the foreigner here!

hugs Lo

Bon Voyage!

Today, I leave for France!

This is an extremely long day flying from the mid-west to New York to Paris to Montpellier, France!

It is a trip that is so familiar now.  I love to go!  France, now feels like my second home.  I will be in the South of France for the next 6 weeks or so. So posts will have some new inspiration from the experiences of good wine, good cheese, good company!  The sea, the beauty of a rich historical area and soccer will also be part of the mix.  Stay tuned!

I leave behind my son, who is amazing.  I will miss him immensely,  He is going to spend his time with his father.  Divorce is a strange disease of our modern times – isn’t it!  Nonetheless,  I am so happy for him to have quality time in with his father.  My two older daughters are far away too.  Lauren in Boston- she rocks!  She has a great career and is in love!  I watch her (creep her)  via the Facebook page; We also have had a few brief visits and many talks on the phone.  Brianne is in Canada.  She is going to go to Hawaii this summer!  I am so happy for her. I miss these girls tons.   I hope to have a reunion trip in the near future!

Well, I must go now.  My hair is soaking wet, my luggage needs a final check over and I need to get to the airport!!!

I guess,  all of you are learning a wee bit about me and my life!  Being real is part of being authentic.  Anyone, leaving on a jet plane for somewhere special?  For love? For work? For pleasure?  Would love to share!

Mille Bisous – Lo

PLAYTIME: Time to be free!

Silly is a choice!

Do you remember being a little girl or boy?

Playing in the sandbox, riding your bike full force down an enormous hill, climbing a tree… blowing bubbles out of your nose!

Yes, you know you have done it all. I have!

I used to climb a big, old tree out in the front yard.  I would sit up there and listen (ok spy) on those that walked by.  I heard stories of wives sharing their intimate stories of sex, of an old man ranting to himself about his bills and many, many more.  I would giggle with delight.  BTW – never shared any stories I heard.  It was silly but so much fun!

I used to dance on the ledge of our patio porch.  It was deemed dangerous by my parents, but that just made it more of an adventure.  At night, I’d sneak out with three flashlights.  Each time, I’d set up them in position to be spotlights for the big show.  I would dress up, put make-up on and dance!  I would dance along that ledge, twirl and let my creative spirit out.  If someone came outside, they would have called me crazy or punished me for a month.  It was silly, so alive and fun!

I could go on… right into my silly moments in junior high, high school, or college.  I have done many fun things with my kids, my friends and partners!    Most didn’t create any damage but were crazy fun!

So, now as a ‘mature woman’ I find I am asking myself if I can still be silly.

Can I do some fun things just to laugh, to play, to break out of the mold of conformity?  You betcha I can!!!!

Can you?  What does it feel like?  I challenge you this weekend to be silly, play and have fun!!!

Forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair.

~ Khalil Gibran ~

France here I come

I am busy packing up my luggage for a long trip to France!  if you could see my room, you would laugh.  Clothes, shoes, books and general stuff strewn all over the place.  I am like a little girl excited about my big adventure.  What to take?  What to leave behind?

Next week, I will return to the South of France to be with my boyfriend.  It is so very exciting to go!

France is such a wonderful country and to be there, in love is absolutely magical.  I am so grateful!

Curious….

Long Distance relationships are not easy…but I would go to the end of the world to spend time with him.    Does anyone have a long distance relationship?  What holds you together when you are not physically together?  Are there special ways you stay connected?  I would love to know.

Please feel free to share your stories of love and love that can last through time and space.

Shadow on the Wall

France is sexy and very proud of it.  It is a country where flirting,
public signs of affection and seduction is la recette du jour!
But recently, things changed.  Our media and theirs has been flooded with images of a powerful public figure who has been arrested for allegedly  trying to rape a woman.  Dominique Strauss-Kahn known as a “seducer” in France had a reputation for being a womanizer.  He was also a presidential hopeful.  All this came crashing down… with the slip of a zipper and perhaps something very much more dangerous. A criminal act is the charge.  This is not so sexy even to the French!

Now, I am not writing this to let you know about the news of the day.
I challenge you to think deeper!

Why do people self-sabatoge and cause enormous chaos in the process?

SHADOW SHADOW:

Carl Jung talks about the Shadow.  It  exists in all of us (Yes  in
you and me too!).  It is the parts that we hide, shame and suppress.
It is the  prison cell were we lock all we feel would be unacceptable
to share.  It can show up in anger, fear, control, selfishness,
indiscretions…you name it!

We run from our shadows but we can’t.  Each time we think a ‘bad
thought’ or do something we feel is unacceptable , we run more… and
guess what is there right behind us?

The Shadow can run our lives.  It can be the reason you scream at your
spouse, eat pounds of chocolate, have a secret sex life.  This part
can sabotage our lives when we least expect it.

When we can love ‘all of us’ and accept our duality we will be able to freer.

Again, I don’t know why this man  hurt himself and others but maybe the answers lies in the shadow?

Fear – DON”T BUG ME!

So this morning I was attacked by a bug! 

Well not exactly attacked but this nasty bug with creepy legs crawled across my bathroom counter.  Now seriously, I never gave him permission.  He was not invited and heck was not paying me any rent to be there.   I screamed and swatted it out of the sink. All I got in return was a shot of fear!

FEAR!

Does anyone really like that creepy creature either.  I have never said, “Bring on the fear!”  Well I might agree to fear BUT only at a local amusement park or during a scary movie. Generally speaking it is not comfortable.

Do we give our power over to our fears?  I have!

Is there healthy fear?  Absolutely!  A car is barreling down the street and almost hits me is cause for fear.

But there is another kind of fear.  It is an unproductive fear that emotionally can clobber us.  This pest diminishes our perspective and is generally demeaning. Do you know this kind of ‘bug’?  That pest gnaws at the structure of rational thought.  It can knock down our self-esteem in seconds and take us down to your knees in minutes.  I sure know it!  Do you?

Fears tend to be born from past conditioned thoughts or patterns.  Defensiveness is at the root.

This pest called fear can simply be lovingly observed… like watching the bug troll across the counter.

I used to suffer from panic and unhealthy anxiety.  Something I learned to do to cope was to:

1.  NAME MY FEAR.    ( Just like saying – this is a pesky little bug on my counter.)

2.  STUDY THE HISTORY OF MY FEAR:  ( I also ask myself when did I learn to fear this.  I fear bugs because when I was young my friend told me  Earwigs and other bugs can eat my brain.  I believed it.)

3. SELECT A NEW THOUGHT; Replace thought with Empowered Thought:  ( I know how to get rid of this bug. It can’t hurt me.)

4. FEEL:  If you need to cry or laugh or spit and yell – DO IT!  Release is good!

5. ANCHOR THE NEW THOUGHT WITH ACTION:  ( I immediately took a piece of paper and tossed the bug out the window.)

This may sound too easy… BUT it works.  Breathe into your fears, transform the thoughts with love and kindness.

Please share your fears… bring them into the light and give them a new perspective.  Feel free to post about your fears.

with love,

Lorraine

P.S:  My bug looks pretty small now!  Some perspective makes all the difference.

Being Human

Rumi was a Sufi poet (Sufism is an Islamic Mysticism) who lived in the 1200’s. He is  a Spiritual Poet. Sufis doctrine is  to experience the spiritual in the present.

I first read “The Essential Rumi” when I was in a very low part of my life.  My dear friend Daly De Gagne recommended it to me.  One poem resonated deeply – “The Guest House”  At that time in my life I had a serious depression.  It engulfed me.

In some respects I shamed the feelings and pushed anything that was not “good” away.  Imagine a day of not judging anyones feelings.  Accepting lovingly what gifts may come from our authentic nature. How does that feel?

For me the poem was about acceptance.

THE GUEST HOUSE

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

 
~ Rumi ~
(The Essential Rumi, versions by Coleman Barks)

Don’t Worry Be Happy

The day was gray, the weather the pits and I had to go pay a bill.  Not exactly the most exciting or happy things to focus on.  But, life has commitments and little surprises too.  Then while driving, I heard the song “Don’t Worry Be Happy”  by Bobby McFerrin.     I am serious- it is the best song for elevating a mood.   I am dead serious!   I was tapping my fingers to the tune and singing along. I am certain the other drivers saw me as crazy!

My friends who are radio broadcasters, or musicians might say it is a very, simple song.   Admittedly,  it is not Mozart BUT released in September 1988, it was a BillBoard 100 Hit.  At the  1989 Grammy Awards, “Don’t Worry Be Happy” won the awards for Song of the Year, Record of the Year and Best Pop Vocal Performance.

I know you can’t resist — Join me… Don’t Worry, Be Happy!

Well soon after finishing my chores , I came home and YouTubed the song.   My son Brennen came into my room and burst into a big  smile.  “Hey mom, you o.k. ?”  He laughed, we laughed!  Such a precious moment!

A simple song, a simple concept that can change a simple day.

Well Deserved Rest

Just sending a very brief Hello!  I have been extremely busy being mom!  My daughter Lauren came in from Boston. It was so wonderful to spend time with her and my son Brennen.  We did so much and also laughed lots.   I did miss seeing my daughter Brianne.  She is in Canada.  I send her my love.

Got up at 5am to take Lauren back to the airport. Ok, so I am not like the monks who get up and meditate at the wee hours in the morning.  I love my sleep!

In an attempt to be congruent and do what I say!  I am listening to my body.  Yes!!!!  It is crying out ” I hurt, I need to rest, I need to sleep NOW!”

So now, I need some sleep to catch up!    Rest is good sometimes!  See you later….

zzzzz….  until I awake Lorraine

STOP… No change please!

Our lives are moving so fast… this is an age of immense change!  We want it… yet FEAR it too.  Holding onto that fear can be paralyzing.  Have you ever experienced that?  What do you do to move past it?

I often give my fear a voice… listen to it… is it fear of failure, fear of unknown, or of being judged or heck maybe the fear of what if, what if, what if!!!!

I try not to shame myself or try to push it away. This can cause a very destructive cycle of anxiety.  You begin to fear the fear.

I ask myself what my fear has to teach me and then gently move on. In Buddhism there is a saying,  If we learn to control our mind….the source of all our fear, healthy and unhealthy, is eradicated.
Not easy at first but with practice, it is so freeing.

Maybe you are a bit like me and so many others… clinging desperately to things that no longer empower, staying in life situations that just don’t fit… don’t help you to grow. Maybe you are in a career, relationship etc. out of habit.  Ultimately, you have a choice.  Each day, each moment you can decide to live life in fulfillment.

What would that look like?  President Obama used the campaign slogan, “Change We can Believe In.”  What can you believe in?  Imagine the wonderful life, the magical you of your greatest dreams.   Today we can make a choice to be the change we want to see….

Let’s Believe!

Sanctuary

Last year I attended a workshop called Come Alive at Haven P.D. Seminars in British Columbia, Canada.  It was my second time doing it.  NO, not because I didn’t get it the first time but because I wanted to dive deeper to learn more about others, authentic being and myself.  The teachers there are truly masters.  I love them all dearly.   Each and everyone of  the participants in the program touched me deeply in some way.  Their stories and memories will be with me always.

One of the reoccurring themes in my work was a sense of HOME.  In my life, I have travelled lots, moved many times and had several life partners.  A deep desire in me was to feel secure and at home.  What does home mean?  Is it portable?  Does it exist?

Upon returning to my physical home, I began to see that it felt vacant and cold.  I had felt abandoned by my husband, haunted by past woes and so felt a sense of emptiness in my personal space.  Our homes are not simply a room or rooms to sleep and eat in.  They need to feel like a haven.. it is a reflection of who and what we are, believe and dream about.  Visit Stacy– at Authentichome to learn more about being HOME!

Soak it up!

Life is so filled with schedules, deadlines, decisions and commitments.  Worry, worry and worry!  We move at such a fast pace.  Whirling around half the time unconscious has become a way of being.  I know I have done so much in my life out of habit and routine. Then only at the end of the day, I ask ‘why’ and then start it all over again.

Sometimes, I just want to say stop!  Just breathe and really use all the senses to appreciate all around and within.  Soak it up…  be more still – less rushed.  REALLY SOAK IT UP – right now.

Ok… there goes the little mind saying…

I can do this but just for an hour or wee awhile.  Then it continues on saying that this is SO unproductive.

I  confess I am recovering type A personality.  When I feel sad, angry, hurt, bewildered… you name it… my mode of operating is to get busy.

Patience… Lo… I need to learn it.  So today,  I am going to the beach!  Just to go.  Feel the wind in my face, sun on my body and hear the wonderful rage of the sea.  I hope it will be restorative.  Now, where do I find the off button for this mind! lol

Soak up your day… my friends!

Stories of Love

I am now in France.  To be more precise, the South of France in a small community just outside of Montpellier.  Why?  Because I am in love..because I want to spend time with my darling Jean-Luc.
A little history for you!  My mother was born in France.  She came from the North of France in a city called Metz.  My father, who was in the Canadian Air Force, was posted in Metz.  He was young, dedicated to his work and committed to return once his term was complete.  But, life and love has a way of changing things.  It did for him!  Boy, did it.  He fell in love with my lovely mother, who was a single mother of two children (trust me–that was more rare back then).  My dad threw caution to the wind.  So did she!  They married and stayed in France for six years.  Forced to assimilate, he learned a second language and a new way of being.  For all the photos and stories I heard–la vie c’etait magique!  Years later, she with her young children (my sisters Michele,  Christiane and Janine), moved to Canada.  All is the pursuit of love.
Now back to me…  I never expected, after a separation from my husband, that I would allow myself to feel love ‘really’.  I felt shut down and spent.  I was ashamed for my errors, angry for the things that had happened and yes bitter.  I  regrettably hurt many and allowed myself to be hurt too.   But slowly, I let go and allowed myself to heal.  I am mostly agreeable with him and wish him much happiness.  At that point, there was a slight opening.  The door to my heart was barely visible.  My mind urged me to not get close to anyone.  But….
My own life force had different plans.  And… after meeting Jean-Luc..my life has been a journey of much joy.  Of course, it goes without saying, being in France is grand.  Assimilating into a culture that is a huge part of my DNA, my culture, my memories is so very meaningful.  BUT….
Mostly, what I am learning is to detach, let go and let be.  Yes, sometimes very frustrating… because I have to let go of old thought patterns… BUT So liberating and freeing.  It is a lovely life.. I plan to fully appreciate it.
Do you have stories of love, of letting go, moving on, forgiveness?   … so liberating to just trust what comes our way.
I do not know what my future hold.  For today… the story is love!

Histoire D’un Amour

in english:

Story Of A Love

My story is the story of a love
My lament is the wail of two hearts
A romance like so many others
That could have been yours
People from here or somewhere else

It’s the flame that inflames without burning
It’s the dream that’s dreamt without sleeping
Like a tree that stands
Full of strength and tenderness
Into the day that comes

(Chorus)
It’s the story of a love, eternal and common
That brings everyday good and bad things
With the times we embrace or with the times we say goodbye
With the nights of anguish and the wonderful mornings

My story is the story we know
Those who love live the same one, I know
And tragic or very deep
Is the only song of the world
That will never end

It’s the story of a love, eternal and common
That brings everyday good and bad things
With the times we embrace or with the times we say goodbye
With the nights of anguish and the wonderful mornings

My story is the story we know
Those who love live the same one, I know
And naïve or very deep
Is the only song of the world
That will never end
It’s the story of a love

en francais:

Mon histoire c’est l’histoire d’un amour
Ma complainte c’est la plainte de deux cœurs
Un roman comme tant d’autres
Qui pourrait être le vôtre
Gens d’ici ou bien d’ailleurs

C’est la flamme qui enflamme sans brûler
C’est le rêve que l’on rêve sans dormir
Comme un arbre qui se dresse
Plein de force et de tendresse
Vers le jour qui va venir

{Refrain:}
C’est l’histoire d’un amour, éternel et banal
Qui apporte chaque jour tout le bien tout le mal
Avec l’heure où l’on s’enlace, celle où l’on se dit adieu
Avec les soirées d’angoisse et les matins merveilleux

Mon histoire c’est l’histoire qu’on connaît
Ceux qui s’aiment jouent la même, je le sais
Et tragique ou bien profonde
C’est la seule chanson du monde
Qui ne finira jamais.

C’est l’histoire d’un amour
Qui apporte chaque jour tout le bien tout le mal
Avec l’heure où l’on s’enlace, celle où l’on se dit adieu
Avec des soirées d’angoisse et les matins merveilleux

Mon histoire c’est l’histoire qu’on connaît
Ceux qui s’aiment jouent la même, je le sais
Mais naïve ou bien profonde
C’est la seule chanson du monde
Qui ne finira jamais
C’est l’histoire d’un amour


When You love life…

When you love life, it loves you back!

Do you believe this to be true?  I never used to believe it.  In fact, I felt life will always give me a curve ball.  It is hard and sometimes hell.  Anticipate trouble!  Is this a healthy way to think?  Have you felt like that?

So what if we decide to simply LOVE life.  And… see what happens.  Pourquoi pas?  Why not?  I challenge you to be honest and ask yourself this question.  I did.

Of course, at first it seems like you are lying to yourself.  Perhaps your life is filled with strife.  Many transitions, divorce, financial challenges, and arguments.  Or maybe, like me, you made poor choices, acted not in your best or in others best interest either.  Messed up royally!   Haven’t we all!  It is never too late to turn towards the most natural and wonderful thing… LOVE.

We are co-creators of our lives.  Perhaps whatever we give returns, sooner or later, and what we focus on expands and grows with time.  If this is true… why not focus on love.  Imagine – Feel It!

My dear friend used to say that love is meant to be expressed.  In all our thoughts, words and actions we can feel and share it.

Admittedly, I academically believed this but internally continued to reject this concept; after all that would make me responsible.  For me, I was still being held hostage by many past hurts and even some limiting believes of life’s potential.  But, being a wee bit interested in science, I decided to challenge myself and let go to allow love!

Want LOVE?  Give love too!

1.  Wake up each morning and simply be.  Take time to look around at the beauty that life offers.  With all your senses take in the sights and sounds that this day has to offer. When you get in the shower feel it, smell it.  When you have your morning coffee, taste it fully!  Breathe in — deeply — this day has much love to present to you!  Be open with all your senses to it!

Try it for a week and tell me what happens.  I’d love to share in the beauty that will unfold.

2.  Share the love you feel with others.  You never know, but the kindest of gestures can make someones day.  Smile at a stranger, open a door for an elderly man, give a few coins to a homeless family or donate a few hours to a local agency.  Be creative, be open to sharing your love… be spontaneous!

3. My mother used to say turn your tongue seven times in your mouth before you speak. It has taken me years, and too many mistakes to count to know what she meant. Take time to use loving words, thoughts and direct actions.

4.  Oh and don’t forget– cast your judgments aside..  That also means towards yourself too.  Be loving and kind to you… that l will allow you love even more!

with love, I invite you to purely enjoy the process!

Where to Begin?

My friend and therapist used to begin our sessions with a most meaningful expression… “Where to begin?”

I decided that was a perfectly fixing way to begin my blog.  So, after hours of thinking about what to say, what not to say, what..what ..what.  I decided.. JUST BEGIN!

So here I am at the beginning…

The very first time I remember hearing the word Authentic was in my 7th grade history class.  We had it as a vocabulary word about the ‘real’ art pieces.  I looked it up in the dictionary and saw so many definitions.  The Webster defined it as:

1.obsolete:authoritative
2. worthy of acceptance or belief as conforming to or based on fact <paints an authentic picture of our society>b: conforming to an original so as to reproduce essential features <an authentic reproduction of a colonial farmhouse>c: made or done the same way as an original <authenticMexican fare>
3. not false or imitation:realactual <an authentic cockney accent>
4.aof a church mode: ranging upward from the keynote — compare plagal 1bof a cadence: progressing from the dominant chord to thetonic — compare plagal 2
5. true to one’s own personality, spirit, or character
Being one of those “touchy, feeling kids” , I was more struck by the 5th definition than the ones relating to artifacts of historical accuracy.  I thought about what was my ‘real’ self.  Did it exist? Was I a fake? Did I live out of obligation of all the expectations of others.   Of course, boys, sports and other interests soon took over.  I tucked these thoughts away for a few years more!
Much later, I came upon a poem by Virginia Satir.  Her words resonated!  Her poems encouraged and motivated me to breathe deeper into my own nature.  I felt comforted.  There was such great potential locked within all of us.  I hope these words inspire you too!
I am Me
In all the world, there is no one else exactly like me Everything that comes out of me is authentically me Because I alone chose it I own everything about me

My body, my feelings, my mouth, my voice, all my actions,
Whether they be to others or to myself – I own my fantasies,
My dreams, my hopes, my fears – I own all my triumphs and
Successes, all my failures and mistakes

Because I own all of me, I can become intimately acquainted with me – by so doing
I can love me and be friendly with me in all my parts – I know
There are aspects about myself that puzzle me, and other
Aspects that I do not know – but as long as I am
Friendly and loving to myself, I can courageously
And hopefully look for solutions to the puzzles
And for ways to find out more about me
However I look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever
I think and feel at a given moment in time is authentically
Me – If later some parts of how I looked, sounded, thought
And felt turn out to be unfitting, I can discard that which is
Unfitting, keep the rest, and invent something new for that
Which I discarded – I can see, hear, feel, think, say, and do

I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be
Productive to make sense and order out of the world of
People and things outside of me – I own me, and
therefore I can engineer me – I am me and I AM OKAY

Poem by Virginia Satir


For more information on her life and work.  http://www.avanta.net/

%d bloggers like this: